And now for your pleasure, a Debbie Downer rant.

Wahhh wahhhh.

Today’s subject: Women who don’t know how to behave in the gym locker room.

Today in the locker room after my work out the ONE OTHER WOMAN in the room chose to use the locker directly next to me, both limiting my space and making me uncomfortable once she sat down on the bench and began eating some fruit out of a small Tupperware container as I dried off from my shower and changed. It was like she was at the movies, only instead of popcorn she had fruit, and instead of watching trailers she was getting a nice look at my rack. I wanted to say something to her, but she’s not the only guilty one.

Almost every day at the gym, these women are there. These women who for some reason like to hang out in the locker room. Most of the time the culprits are held up by some really, really important cell phone conversation. Like the day one woman, we’ll call her “Sally,” was sitting on a bench in the locker room talking on her phone when I arrived to work out. I changed, worked out, showered, changed back into my clothes and left the gym as Sally carried on her conversation. Sally, come on! If you have such an important, long telephone conversation, why do you want to do it in a room full of naked, sweaty women (and note to all the men reading this, I don’t think Sally was there for the show).

But Sally’s not the only one. So many people talk on their cell phones in the locker room it’s like a big phone booth. I get it if you’re saying “oh, well I just got to the gym, bye luv yaaazzzz” but if you’re having a 15 minute conversation, you should take it elsewhere, ladies.

Here are some simple rules about locker room etiquette:

1. If you know you are going to be on a long telephone call, don’t go to the gym. There are far better places to have a business or personal conversation than in the middle of a locker room – and it can’t be comfortable to sit on those benches for a long time.

2. If you think you’re going to need to eat something – do it before you’re in the locker room.

3. If you want to walk around naked, GO FOR IT GIRL. I just won’t be joining you.

4. If you are one of the only people in the locker room, choose a locker that doesn’t border one of the ones already being used.


I think if people follow these little tips, it will make for a much better changing experience for everyone involved.