Thursday, February 18, 2010


Tomorrow morning at 11 AM, it's all about WWTS - What Will Tiger Say? Tiger's gonna make his first public appearance since all the crazy (and crazier, and craziest) shiz has gone down. Starting with the car crash heard 'round the world, continuing with the emergence of over 10 biddies who say Tiger's had his way with them, this circus has been oddly mesmerizing to the general public as the clean cut golfer's bad boy side was revealed.

But, what now? Why does Tiger want to address us? Is he returning to golf? Issuing a statement that he is now single and ready to mingle with any willing parties? Revealing the ending to the last season of LOST? I guess we can only wait until tomorrow to see.

Some golfers on the pro tour think this is a rude move by Tiger, making a statement during the first big tournament of the year. Stealing the spotlight from the sport he abandoned.

Ernie Els told Golfweek magazine, "It's selfish. You can write that. I feel sorry for the sponsor. Mondays are a good day to make statements, not Friday. This takes a lot away from the golf tournament."

Yeah, Tiger, come on. What could you possibly have to say that is more interesting than a golf tournament without you in it? (If Tiger were here, he'd reply, "Anything." And I would agree. And then we'd probably bang because he would seduce me with his Blasian ways and smooth, playa style. Just kidding. He's not my type. I'm not his type.)

So keep refreshing tomorrow morning around 11 as Tiger's statement pours out. I'm hoping for a running list of all biddies banged. But if I can't get that, I'll take a return to golf. Then we can ponder other important questions - like if people will be quiet during his putts anymore, or if feminists in the crowd will scream during his backstrokes.


Anonymous said...

mayyybe he is announcing what STDs he has accumulated, giving his 10 ladies a heads up...

Rusty said...

I can't believe you want to bone tiger woods.

Anonymous said...