Karaoke Superstar.

I have a tee shirt that says Karaoke Superstar on it. I didn’t buy it because I think it’s funny, or stylish, or because it’s just that right shade of green. I don’t take the slogans on shirts lightly. I honestly believe that I am a Karaoke Superstar. And it’s not because I have a really good voice, because I don’t. It’s also not because I have a really awful voice that’s fun to imitate (William Hung). In fact, I’m not really sure why I think I’m a Karaoke Superstar…

Maybe it’s because last summer in LA I lived down the street from DIMPLES, the first ever Karaoke bar in America. And the first time I went there, I performed Celene Dion’s “It’s All Coming Back to Me Now” with my roommate who I didn’t even really know that well. And we rocked the shit out of it. I’m not just saying that because I felt good up there. Or because I was drunk. Because I was completely sober. I’m saying it because when the song started, the completely packed house was moaning because of our selection. But by the end of our rendition, after I growled out the climactic “BABY, BABY, BABY,” the audience was screaming for more. And for us to make out. So as I stood up there, watching the video play back on their large projection screen, and seeing the gems on the crown I had put on shine as I belted out lyrics from my favorite French Canadian diva, I just knew that me and Karaoke were meant to be.

That summer, my roommate and I took every opportunity we could to hone our karaoke skills. We were the only people to sing songs in English every Margarita Monday night at our favorite Mexican joint down the street, we continued to frequent Dimples regularly, and we even sang among the child stars at the open mic night in the Oakwood Community we called home. I think I finally knew I hit the big time after we performed at one such open mic night (Kelly Clarkson’s “Breakaway”) and was approached by a showbiz mom who eagerly told me, “I love your voice. It’s very unique.” What she was thinking was “I wish you were my daughter. I would have had you in auditions at the age of four.” That moment was when I graduated from Karaoke novice, to Karaoke Professional.

How did I become a superstar, you ask? Well after leaving Los Angeles, I sort of fell out of my Karaoke ways…back at school in Ithaca I wasn’t accustomed to the places that provided the sport of imitation singing, and I seemed to be busy every Wednesday night, the one day each week the locals came out to sing their hearts out at The Haunt. But I kept at it, singing in the shower, and sometimes jamming out to Oxygen OnDemand, which allows you to perform primitive Karaoke in your own living room. But it just wasn’t satisfying my itch. I needed a stage, I needed an audience…I needed – Spring Break.

Mrytle Beach. March 2008. Six girls and one dude (mega pimp) trucked it down to South Carolina to lie on the beach during the day, and drink the nights away. After a pricey dinner at Senor Frogs, and a frustratingly expensive tequila shot, we decided to try and find a cheaper way to spend our first Spring Break night. We found it. And boy did we love it. It was called Broadway Louie’s. And it just so happened they had Karaoke every night of the week. After two of us were selected to be judges for the Karaoke Contest that night (and given a $40 bar tab), we decided this was the place for us and sat back to enjoy the show. It took a little while to get back into my singing to the masses mode, but I decided to sign up to sing my girl Rihanna’s “Shut up and Drive.”

As I found my way to the stage and looked out into the audience, I thought to myself, “This is it. This is what I’ve been dreaming of.” So I sang that song. And I did not hold back. I dished out RiRi’s lyrics with the grace of a woman, not the timidity of a girl. And as I held my microphone out into the crowd of my friends in front of me so they could sing the famous “Shut up and Drive” line for all to hear, I knew that I had finally become – A Karaoke Superstar.

Every night that week we frequented Broadway Louie’s. And every night we rocked the house, acquiring fans and friends. We may have left Myrtle Beach at the end of the week, but we were forever in the hearts of the folks at Broadway Louie’s. They even took a photo of us as we left on that last faithful Friday night and posted it on the homepage of their website.

And that’s the most important thing I’ve learned about being a Karaoke Superstar – that even though it’s about the fun and glory, you gotta look out for your fans. Because when it comes down to it, they’re counting on you for a great time. So as I pick my next Karaoke hit to grace the stage with, and look out at the drunken masses I sing to, I will smile and sing my heart out.

Because I am a Karaoke Superstar.