farewell jersey shore...

Tonight marks the end of the most fun pop culture has had in a long, long while - it's the finale of Jersey Shore! In the words of Snooki, I say "Wahhh." What will I do each week without my dose of my guidos and guidettes, without watching Ronnie beat the shit out of people on the boardwalk and put up with the sweetest bitch I'll ever meet's crap? What will I do without watching the Situation as he navigates GTL every day, and without Snooki being...well, Snooki.



I think it's safe to say that watching Jersey Shore has changed my life. It has fundamentally changed me as a person. My skin is turning tanner, although I haven't been out in the sun at all. When I see certain girls out I ponder if they would be a grenade, and my instincts to fight people have grown exponentially. My blood alcohol level content is also really high, even when I'm not drinking. And when I bleed, I bleed tomato sauce.

All of which I think are improvements on my former self. So why must Jersey Shore be over? As a small consolation, a one-hour reunion show will be airing tonight immediately following the end of what I think is a very important era in television history.

So tune in tonight and get your last Jersey Shore fix until they (hopefully) give us a season 2. And in the meantime, beat the beat.

MTV @ 10.

funny looking animals of the week!

a puppy sitting on a cat.

my goodbye to florida pic

taken out the back window of the rental car on the way to the airport in west palm beach on monday...

hilarious and amazing marketing

via scary basement.

funny looking animals of the week!

via ffffound.

i miss mad men.

NBA Jam is coming back!!!

He's heating up...

HE'S ON FIRE!

Those were legendary sound bytes from a legendary video game that is apparently going to be brought back and updated for Wii. I hope you have to actually make a slam dunk motion with your num-chuck in order to SLAM A JAM.

More on this here.

i want to go to there

Wally Hermes Why Yacht is designed to function less like a yacht, and more like your own personal island. Level 1 includes living space with a beach, spa, dining room, music room and cinema. Level 2 features the suites, lounge and library, and Level 3 is the owner's space. There's also a pool around the helipad for non ocean swimming.



The yacht also includes green features like solar paneling and a diesel-electric propulsion system that helps the boat save up to 200 tons of diesel per year.



If I ever owned (or even was on) a boat like this I would be dead and in heaven.

More about the yacht here.

funny looking animal of the week!

via imgur.

Miserable Marci’s Monday Rant - what a long strange trip its been.

Oh 2010. I thought you’d be lucky for me when I scratched a lottery ticket right after midnight and won $1 (yes, instead of kissing someone at midnight, I clutched a $1 lottery ticket in my hand and hoped for the best. that's what addicts do). But alas, last night my luck ran out. And it was only January 3rd. If I spoke frequently in Internet lingo, this would be a good place to place the acronym FML.

So I had a flight from Buffalo to NYC that was supposed to leave at 8:55pm last night. I thought that it wouldn’t be too crazy, it wasn’t like I was traveling right on New Year’s Day, just a random Sunday evening. But then the Lake Effect snow demons decided to descend upon Buffalo starting Saturday night, and continue all through the day on Sunday. It made the Bills game look like this:



And it made traveling miserable. I mean, I don’t even have to go out of my way on this Monday morning to sound miserable. But don’t take my word for it. Let’s look at the data:

Left my home in Buffalo: 7:30PM
Arrive at airport: 8:00PM
Plane is delayed.
Time my plane was supposed to leave: 8:55PM
Time I boarded my plane and then sat to de-ice before taking off: 11PM
Time we landed in NYC: 12:43AM

Here’s where it gets real awful. The baggage took its sweet ass time coming down, and then the AIR TRAIN BROKE DOWN.

So I walked all the way back to the taxi stand. Where there was a line of about 100 people in the cold waiting for taxis I can’t afford anyways.

So I walked all the way back to the AirTrain. And waited. Finally it came at 2AM, conveniently dropping me at Jamaica station just in time to see the train to Penn pulling away.

Then I killed myself.

JUST KIDDING! I’m alive now to tell you the tale.

Then I merely waited 15 minutes for the next train, which departed at 2:32AM.

Arrived at Penn Station around 3AM. Walked to PATH station. Waited 20 minutes for PATH to arrive.

Got closer… to my… apartment… and finally… got off the PATH and cabbed it home.

Arrival time in Jersey: 4AM.

Total trip duration: 8.5 hours.
Total methods of transport I used: 6
Realizing you’d rather kill yourself than continue on your journey: Priceless.

But it’s okay. It was all worth it. Because now I am at work. My favorite place in the world.

End rant.

help yourself - sad brad smith

featured in Up in the Air.

not top 10

This was #2 on Sportscenter's "Not Top 10" list of 2009. It made me giggle on the treadmill this morning. Enjoy:

funny looking animal of the week!

goodbye 2009!

when harry met sally

what a great movie.

merry christmas

scared of santa.

(via ffffound)

Snooki - Streetfighter

funny looking animal of the week!

(thanks, michelle!)

DEF lineman loses his pants!

the ithaca tundra

Stumbled across a ‘jersey shore nickname generator’ so I did the obv thing and generated nicknames for my kendall ladies.

The Ithaca Tundra Starring:

Becca: the appointment

Marci: m-pow

Hoover: the opportunity

Colleen: vibe time

Mallory: last call

fab-u-lous.

from mallory :)

AVATAR was pretty sweet.

(pic via ffffound)

another reason i love my family...

Just got an email from my mom about my office holiday party tonight. Here's an excerpt:

So what did you wear to work today, with your party in mind?  Don't get too drunk!  Remember last year?  You got lost!

She's taunting me!

reason i love my family

besides being my most loyal blog followers, i love this:

can a legend live forever?

In a recent Entertainment Weekly interview about his new movie Avatar, James Cameron talks about how with the new technology he utilized, he was able to seamlessly translate an actor’s performance into a synthetic computer-generated character.

Cameron makes a point that although they chose to use this technology to create blue CGI aliens, they could have just as easily made the computer-generated character look like a human:

“If we had put the same energy into creating a human as we put into creating the Na’vi, it would have been 100 percent indistinguishable from reality. The question is, why the hell would you do that? Why not just photograph an actor? Well let’s say Clint Eastwood really wanted to do one last Dirty Harry movie, looking the way he did in 1975. He could absolutely do it now. And that would be cool.”

I’ve heard of this notion of having movie stars play a younger CGI version of themselves, but it scares me a little, for several reasons.

1. Will it lead to someday just having computerized characters take over every part in every movie, so acting is rendered obsolete?

2. How will we foster new movie stars or icons if we don’t allow them to break through in roles of their own, since we’re too busy putting older movie stars in movies?

3. Will it be more of a distraction than anything else to have recognizable movie stars at a younger age taking on lead roles in new movies?

Only time will tell. But we're safe for now. Big blue aliens are no Eastwood.

funny looking animal of the week!

Check out: Tim Burton @ MOMA

Yesterday I checked out the MOMA for the first time, and the museum itself is really great — huge, open space, lots of great work. Got to see Van Gogh’s Starry Night, Monet’s Water Lilies, as well as works by Dali, Matisse, Warhol, and Jackson Pollock.

But the real reason I chose to go to MOMA yesterday was for the Tim Burton exhibit, which will be up until April 26th. I thought I would enjoy the exhibit, but it was even more enjoyable than I first thought it would be. Burton has been making art for over 30 years, and in this exhibit we get to see him evolve as an artist. From high school assignments scrawled in cursive on notebook paper, to college notes on art and design, all the way through to sketches and notes on movies like "Edward Scissorhands" and "The Nightmare Before Christmas," we get a glimpse into the mind of Burton that is really fascinating.

Even though we got to see some really cool props from movies, like Batman masks, Beetlejuice’s leggings and the original scissorhands that Edward donned, the most interesting part of this exhibit, in my opinion, was anytime I could read something Burton had written.

There were handwritten pages where the writing of a movie was begun, notes next to sketches that indicated what sorts of animations or sequences might happen to certain characters, and even a letter to Johnny Depp suggesting a line that the Willy Wonka might say (the line was actually used in the movie). It just demonstrated the brilliance of Burton, and showed that he was always thinking and full of ideas and passionate about his work.

One other really interesting part of the exhibit was an illustrated children’s book Burton wrote and drew when he was 18, and the letter he wrote when he sent this book to Walt Disney to get their thoughts. To send a homemade book to a company as big as Disney was a bold move for an 18 year old I thought, and the fact that he received a type written response with notes and pointers was really amazing. I think right in this spot we can see the determination and ambition Burton possessed.

Overall, a very inspiring exhibit. It makes you want to start creating things. Check it out, @ MOMA through April 26. Tickets - $20 Adult, $12 Students

sweet million banner ad

nothing makes me want to play the lottery more than a giraffe that's throwing up rainbows and poopin' flowers...

?

if you want to feel old...

watch this video of 9 year olds talking about the past decade...

The decade according to 9-year-olds from allison louie-garcia on Vimeo.

Found this on my wonderfully wonderful friend Liz's blog.

loofah, loofah...

just kidding just kidding just kidding

i love judy grimes.

miserable marci's post of the day

This morning on my commute IT WAS RAINING! That sucks and makes me mad. Why does it have to rain during the hours of my commute to and from work, and usually stop during the day? Also, why did it rain every weekend of the summer, but the sun was shining whilst I slaved away in my office during the week? F YOU, RAIN!

But there are things that make the rain that much more irritating. One of which being people. And especially people carrying really huge umbrellas for no reason. There is a reason they call them BEACH umbrellas. It is because they are made for multiple people to sit underneath whilst at the beach, not for walking down the already crowded sidewalks of Manhattan, idiots. Are you really that large a person that you need to carry an umbrella made for 4? And if you are that large, you deserve to get drenched.

Also, in general I usually get mad about people who walk really slow. I mean, if you want to mosey around the streets, that's fine. But please don't walk erratically back and forth, or walk in rows of 4 really slowly taking up the whole sidewalk. ESPECIALLY if it's raining, since some people like to walk briskly to get out of the rain.

Anyways, here is a pie chart to sum up my feelings on this:


Those people in the overlap... really hate them.

Jump Jim Crow

My brother's in a show that opens tonight - Jump Jim Crow.

Performances will run December 8th-20th at the Ukrainian Center. Shows are from Tuesday-Sunday. Shows running on weeknights and Saturdays are at 8:00 pm, 3:00 pm matinees will run on both Saturdays and Sundays (exception: there will be no 3:00 pm matinee on Saturday, December 19th). For reservations, email reservations@subjectivetheatre.org.

check it out, it's free!

a constant battle

"My mind resides somewhere inside of myself. That being the case, one would assume I have privileged access to it. In theory, I should be able to ask myself questions and get different answers than I would from other people, such as you. But I'm not sure we truly have privileged access to our minds. I don't think we have any idea who we are. I think we're engaged in a constant battle to figure out who we are."

-Errol Morris

(via Eating the Dinosaur by Chuck Klosterman)

funny looking animal of the week!

via world animal day at the Big Picture

6 year old football player who knows how to hit

my favorite part is that you can hear the first kid who gets hit crying... poor guy didn't know what was coming.

don't mess with twilight

a 22 year old girl was arrested and faces up to 3 years in jail for taping 3 minutes of New Moon on a digital camera.

This will be her jury:

jersey shore on mtv

I don’t really think there’s a need to blog about this, most people have already heard of this new provocative series, or seen it already. But for those of you who haven’t, get on it. Now. Especially if you need a good laugh, enjoy watching fist pumps, or need to find reasons to feel better about yourself.

Jersey Shore is basically the same show as The Real World, but the house they live in is on the Jersey Shore. And instead of getting a wide variety of conflicting personalities to live together in this house, mtv has arranged for a slew of self-proclaimed “guidos” and “guidettes” to inhabit the beach house. Hilarity ensues.


Some standouts from the beginning included Mike “The Situation,” which is a nickname he’s given himself to reference his washboard abs. This seems to just be a reason for him to lift his shirt up and display said abs (and armani exchange boxers) anytime he meets anyone. Oh Situation…


Another awesome cast member is “Snooki,” which is a weird nickname to begin with, but since she got fall-down drunk the first evening upon arriving at the house, no one respects her and they call her many a variation of her nickname without really saying it, such as “Schnookums” or “Schnickers.” And when the people in this house don’t respect you, that’s saying something. But can you blame her for being upset? She’s used to being “the center of attention,” after all she is the "Princess of Poughkeepsie." Oh schnooks…


Then there’s Vinny, who couldn’t go work his grueling shift at the tee-shirt store because he had pink eye, but made a miraculous recovery just in time to go out that night. Oh Vin…

I could go on and on because all these characters um, I mean people, are really gems. But I’m not going to right now. I just will strongly urge you to watch this show. Maybe I’ll do a live blog during a future episode, but I don’t know if I could keep up with all the amazing things that happen.

Jersey Shore. Thursdays @ 10 on mtv.

how i met your mother / frosty mashup

are you ready for some football?

Zoobaz and Uggs were good luck on Sunday vs. the Dolphins.

Hopefully whatever I wear tonight will work just as well!

Bills v Jets tonight. 8:30.

GO BILLS!

funny looking animal of the week!

funny looking animal of the week!

Relax chicken! We won't kill you until after we're done eating our turkey :)

via cuteoverload

2 day work week!

yipee!

(via ffffound)

funny looking animal of the week!

boots update

Been scouring the Internets looking for the gap model boots. And I found a pair that look similar:


Unfortunately, they are $450! Oh well, I will just have to settle on a different pair of boots this year. Don't worry America, I found some good ones while I was looking for these puppies. Boots will be had.

a quest for boots

I was shopping on gap.com the other day and came across some boots on a model that I really liked. They are on the header of the women's outerwear page. Here is a screenshot:


As you can see, she is wearing awesome boots:


But alas, as I looked through the shoes available for sale at the Gap, and then Piperlime, and Banana Republic, these boots were nowhere in sight. Desperately, I emailed the gap looking for answers. This is what I heard back:

Dear Marci,

Thanks so much for your email. We’re very pleased that you're shopping with us and want to make sure you find the perfect merchandise for your needs. Regrettably, we don't have any information concerning the shoes in question. These shoes are either props provided by our advertising company, or are those worn by our models to the production. We apologize for any disappointment this may cause.

We hope this information is helpful and we look forward to shopping with you soon.

This is not the answer I was hoping for. Not only did the gap tease me by showing me boots on their model that I cannot obtain from them, they are not very helpful in helping me find said boots.

So I have set out on a quest to find these boots. I have some of the greatest fashion minds of our times on this case, and hopefully with all my troops we will be victorious in finding these boots.

If you have any information regarding where I can find these boots, or answers, please let me know in the comments area. We can find these boots...together.

the curious case of Dolores the bear.

In high school we had a lunch lady named Dolores who was really old and wrinkly, so we referred to her as E.T. The funny thing was that she actually did resemble E.T. Now I’ve found something that gives me reason to believe that all Doloreses are wrinkly. And it all has to do with a bear named Dolores.

Why they named her Dolores, we’ll never know. Maybe it’s because deep down someone knew she would contract a weird condition that made her lose her hair and expose her wrinkly skin. Maybe they just like the sound of it. Either way, look what happened to this usually furry bespectacled bear…



Poor Dolores lost her fur! And it’s not just her — all the female bears at the zoo have developed this condition and lost their hair. They’ve been having a horrible time keeping the male bears off of them, and many watchdog groups are horrified at the slutty behavior of these females. One prominent watchdog official commented on their flooziness, “The amount of skin these ladies are showing is insulting to women everywhere, and setting a horrible example for our children.” A representative for Dolores refused to comment.

Will Dolores’ fur ever grow back? Will her children be afflicted with the same lack of hair? Would Rogain be a viable option?

Only time will tell.

funny looking animal of the week!

salon guy

I was leaving work with my friend Andrea yesterday when we were approached by a man who asked us how much we usually pay to get our hair cut. The following conversation went something like this:

Andrea: Um...usually around $100.

Man: After tip and everything? (looks at me) How about you?

Me: Sixteen dollars.

Man: Sixty?

Me: No. Sixteen.

Man: Where do you go?

Me: Supercuts.

(Man looks upset)

Man: You can't go there, you're too hot for Supercuts!

The man then tries to sell us this salon/spa package for $60 each. Needless to say, we declined.

cool looking animal of the week!

From Jill Greenberg's new photography book, Bear Portraits. She takes some really great shots with great lighting, and has captured the likes of crying toddlers and monkeys. Watch the video below to learn more about Jill and her work, via coolhunting.

new view

the wonderful sites you can see from my new cube.

office move.

last day that this will be the view from my desk

funny looking animal of the week!

Halloween Edition!

gettin' friendly @ friendlys

Free Happy Ending for customers 60 and over?

Now that's good service.

a question not to be tolerated

Reporter: What do you say to parents who think the Wild Things film may be too scary?

Sendak: I would tell them to go to hell. That's a question I will not tolerate.

Reporter: Because kids can handle it?

Sendak: If they can't handle it, go home. Or wet your pants. Do whatever you like. But it's not a question that can be answered.

Sendak: This concentration on kids being scared, as though we as adults can't be scared. Of course we're scared. I'm scared of watching a TV show about vampires. I can't fall asleep. It never stops. We're grown-ups; we know better, but we're afraid.

Reporter: Why is that important in art?

Sendak: Because it's truth. You don't want to do something that's all terrifying. I saw the most horrendous movies that were unfit for child's eyes. So what? I managed to survive.

from an interview in Newsweek with Maurice Sendak, author of Where The Wild Things Are, about the movie.

Gearing up for a JC Hallow’s Eve

Hoover and I were talking about Halloween the last week, and we had the idea that she should dress up like a scarecrow and sit on our porch, then come to life and scare the crap out of kids who are trick or treating. Then we realized that it’s probably not the best idea, seeing as the kid may shoot or shank her, especially when startled. See, living in Jersey City you become aware of a different sort of culture. I once saw a homeless man chasing a kid down the street throwing large rocks at him. Later, I saw the same homeless man being arrested as the kid looked on.

So is life in the dirty Jers. That’s why I’ve decided to come up with a list of the “Top 5 things you need to know for a Jersey City Halloween.” And without further ado…

5. That fake gun might be real.
Don’t think for one second the “toy gun” that seven year old is holding is not loaded. If you are off your guard for one moment, the kid can lock, load, and shoot that weapon faster than you can whip off your Kate Gosselin wig and try to dodge the attack. To combat use of weaponry, make sure you handily disarm any child you see who is holding a gun, sword or blow gun. And if you can’t see where their hands are, you should probably take them to the ground just in case.


4. The unwrapped piece of taffy with shards of glass coming out of it isn’t a new type of candy.
It would probably be a good idea NOT to eat it.

3. If you see a bunch of “doctors,” it’s probably just the cast of the new hit NBC show, Mercy…
Which is shot in Jersey City.


2. Be prepared for a large proportion of Princess Jasmine costumes.
Or Kelly Kapur from The Office.

1. If you see someone dressed as a homeless person, it’s most likely not a costume.
Nothing against the homeless people of JC, but they do exist in pretty large numbers. So if a “large child” dressed in rags shows up at your door smelling a little bit like a soiled diaper, it might not be someone in costume. In this case, promptly close the door to your house and if you’re feeling generous, slide a dollar bill outside.

funny looking animal of the week!

long island edition!
courtesy of rpalmes1

a brilliant idea

Kate Gosselin and Octomom should be each other for Halloween.

twitter facts

twitter why can't I stop hearing about you?

Miserable Marci’s Monday Rant – da bills

The Bills officially are the worst team in football this season. But no, you may say, what about the Rams, who haven't even won a game this season, or the Bucs, who the Bills actually managed to beat? It doesn't matter. The Bills are worse.

During halftime of the game, the sportscasters were doing the recaps of all the NFL games of the day, and when they got to the Bills/Browns game, they literally said, "What a miserable football game." And that was just the first half.

I don't even have the energy to bitch about them today. That's how bad it was. I mean, when you lose to the Cleveland Browns with a score of 6-3, that's saying something about how much you suck. When you have the ball in field goal range and it's 4th and 26 in the first half, maybe you should GO FOR THE FIELD GOAL. Even if it's windy. I think Lindell has a better chance of battling the winds then the Bills' offense has getting 26 yards in one play. Or 26 yards in one half.

Here are some other miserable tidbits from yesterday's game:

• Prior to yesterday's game, Cleveland was on a 10 game losing streak


• Buffalo has lost 12 of their last 15 games


• The Bills have lost their last two games to previously winless teams


• Buffalo had 9 false-starts in yesterday's game, in total they were flagged 13 times for 75 yards


• The Browns only had 2 completions in yesterday's game. And still beat us


• The Bills have only scored 20 points combined in their last 3 games


• Buffalo lost another defensive starter in yesterday's game, Kawika Mitchell, upping the running total of injured defensive starters to 5

I don't think I want to even watch any more games.


....go bills.

one week...

...until this

Freaky Friday....update

Today I walked by the red sweatsuit kid and he was wearing...

A SHIRT AND TIE!


What a day...

awesome looking animal of the week.

via national geographic.

lunch break

Miserable Marci’s Monday Rant – the kid in the red sweats.

As I walk to the PATH station every morning, sometimes I notice my surroundings despite my morning stupor. And one morning, as I walked down the street, I noticed this little Indian boy, probably like 7 years old, walking with his mother on what I'm assuming is the way to school. He was wearing a red long sleeved shirt. And red sweatpants. I thought to myself - will this kid get made fun of? He's wearing matching sweats to school. Then I put it out of my mind and continued on my day.

Imagine my growing concern as I continued to see this child on an almost daily basis, and he continued to wear red sweat pants and a red long sleeved shirt. The kid hasn't changed out of this outfit at all! How can his mother let him do that?! Is he just a figment of my imagination? Could that sweatsuit possibly be a weird school uniform?

What is going on! Needless to say, this poor defenseless boy's outfit really made me mad. Sure, he's seven years old, and yes, I probably wore worse things when I was little, but not the SAME SHITTY THING EVERY DAY!

The kid needs to be spoken to. Or donated other pieces of clothing, perhaps. I need to start a clothing line like TOMS shoes, where whenever I sell an item, the red sweatsuit kid gets a new article of clothing. But until then, ol'Red Sweats will be walking down the street to greet me every morning...

end rant.

cute kids and sports movies... a few of my favorite things

This four year old boy memorized the entire speech from the movie Miracle. I hope my kids are this awesome.